I am not a surfer by any stretch of the imagination, but I am most certainly a kook.
Like many people, I feel a great deal of shame and embarrassment when learning a new skill or trying to do something I'm objectively not that good at. And I won't lie—that has stopped me from fully pursuing things simply because it feels so uncomfortable to be bad at it. The constant self-evaluation and comparison to others can feel so all-consuming that it seems easier to just... not do it.
I'd argue that this is a feeling every single human, in some way, shape, or form, knows. Whether or not you give in to it, we've all encountered that feeling. And isn't it the ultimate human experience to share our deepest worries and then feel the warmth of realizing we're not alone in them?
A few years ago, I was diagnosed with cancer and, as you may imagine, a reevaluation of what was actually important to me quickly followed. Going through treatment, a massive surgery, and an ongoing recovery has changed my perspective in ways I'm still figuring out. One of those ways has been learning to care less about being perfect, and more about doing all the things that make me happy.
My creative pursuits quickly became a big comfort to me when life felt very scary, and they also revealed just how little time I had been allowing myself to spend on something that brings me immense joy. I've always been a creative person, but I've also found plenty of reasons to keep that part of myself mostly tucked away—maybe because creating something means putting yourself out there in a way that feels particularly vulnerable. This project feels like an opportunity to push through that discomfort and explore what it's like to value the experience over the concern with perfection.
Life is so very short and way too beautiful to be held back by fear or shame or any of these scary—but ultimately harmless—feelings.
Committing to this project with my dear friend, Celina, and my husband, Greg, is a great example of something scary that we're all whole-heartedly embracing. All of this is new to us, and it's certainly new to me. Again I ask: what are we going to do instead? Just... not??
I'd much rather be an imperfect, unpolished, having-fun-with-it-all kook—especially if it means giving myself the freedom to be creative, curious, and a little bit bad at something along the way.
And I sincerely hope others feel like they can join us in fully embracing the inner kook that lives in us all.
Stay Kooky,
